Hello again, readers! For the
curious, I did win National Novel Writing Month by writing just over
50,000 words in the month of November. If you weren't curious
well...now you know anyway. I'm sorry I didn't post last week. I
was still doing a victory dance.
So, for this next book, we're headed
back in time where the worst thing that was likely to happen to a
woman in a romance novel was boinking the man of her dreams before
they were married. The scandal!
Viscount Breckenridge to the Rescue
by Stephanie Laurens opens with a family tree, which I didn't
bother looking at, and a list of the fifteen previous books in this
series, which I skimmed. I hope I'm not missing anything important
by jumping in here, because I have no intention of hunting down the
other books. Also, can we just talk about the title for a moment?
Seriously, I wonder what happens. Does Viscount Breckenridge save
the girl? It is a romance novel, after all....
The book opens with a prologue that
really doesn't help me know what's going on at all. Some guy is
sitting in his castle cleaning his guns. No, not like that.
Literally. He thinks about how he and some of the guys went out and
killed some stuff so the castle will have enough food for the week.
He's glad he can provide meat, but that's all he can provide.....
Then his mother enters the room and he ignores her for a bit, which
is apparently something he does to everyone. We get a little about
how her husband didn't see her for the bitter, angry woman she is and
also that her husband is dead now. Also, also, this woman wants her
son to bring one of the “Cynster sisters” to the castle so she
can have revenge. He reflects on how he's in her power and that
sucks before agreeing to bring one of these ladies to this apparently
remote castle. Who are these people? Why are they so angry and so
bent on power games? No idea. The only name we have is for the
folks we follow in chapter one.
Chapter one opens from the point of
view of the beautiful heroine of this story. Her big goal in life is
to find a great husband. Yeah, that's it. Hello, 1829. Anyway,
none of the super-fancy parties she's gone to so far have anyone
worthy of her. She's holding out for a hero. She actually uses the
word hero. Anyway, she wants to meet new people here, but as soon as
she steps in the room she meets the eyes of a beautiful man and that
makes her swear. She's going to pretend that she hasn't seen him.
Then Heather Cynster, the beautiful protagonist, thinks about who's
at this party. She's probably the only unmarried woman there and the
youngest, although at 25, she considers herself old. As
we learned in The Devil Earl,
a woman becomes a spinster if she's unmarried after 21. Or
something. Oh, we also get the detail that Heather snuck out to go
to this party. Her momma thinks she's at home with a headache. What
a rebel.
Heather
starts getting chatted up by this guy, Miles, which she seems to be
pretty okay with, when someone grabs her elbow from behind. Let me
give you her reaction: “Heat washed over her, emanating from the
contact, supplanted almost instantly by a disorienting giddiness.”
Yes, it is Viscount Breckenridge, or Timothy Danvers, grabbing her
arm. I'm going to call him Tim because Viscount Breckenridge is a
ridiculous name. Oh, also, they're going to bang. A lot. Also,
also, this is the same guy whose eyes she met as soon as she walked
in. Just so you know.
Tim
manages to get Miles away from Heather. Then Tim basically drags her
to the door. We do get this interesting inner thought when Tim tells
Heather that she's leaving that party right now. Somebody reflects,
“Hale, whole, virgin intacta.” It's kind of hard to tell whether
it's Tim or Heather thinking that because the POV shifts all over the
place, but I'm guessing it was him. She wouldn't think of herself
that way. Probably.
Heather
is pissy that he's sticking his nose in her business, and he tells
her that her male relations would beat him up if they knew he hadn't
stopped her from this madness. Which is never explained, except that
Tim calls this party “a den of iniquity” so I'm going to assume
there's orgies happening in the back room. Or maybe naked croquet.
Then
we get an intimidation scene on the front porch where she threatens
to scream if he makes her leave and he threatens to knock her out and
throw her in her carriage. Lovely. I'm not sure why he doesn't tell
her what's so awful about this party since he's trying to convince
her that staying there is a bad idea. I guess because she's just a
frail little woman and he's a man who can handle that kind of
knowledge. Never mind the billions of other women in that house.
Oh, just before he intimidates her, he thinks about how her face and
body are all so beautiful and wonderful and whatnot. Yup. Totally
going to bang.
Anyway,
Heather finally agrees to leave but only if he lets her walk to her
carriage alone. He agrees, but watches her walk the whole way. It's
a good thing he does because someone leaps out of a carriage,
snatches her up, and they drive away. For once, I'm not making the
exciting thing up. Hooray! Tim races to Heather's carriage, tells
the coachman that he's a family friend, and they head off.
Apparently Tim is friends with Heather's brothers and cousins. Huh.
Okay then. They follow the carriage for awhile, but they lose it
near an inn. Tim sends the coachman and footman to ask where the
carriage of their pursuit is going while he borrows the inn's fastest
horses and a different kind of carriage. It's a phaeton, if that
means anything to you. The carriage they were following is headed
North out of London. Tim scribbles a note for the servants to give
to one of Heather's big, burly relatives, and then he takes the
carriage out of the yard to track down his lady love. I mean
nemesis.
Meanwhile,
Heather has been bound and gagged in the carriage, but they haven't
done anything else to her. Good, I'm not ready for anything worse to
happen this early in the book. Or at all. Anyway, they explain to
her that screaming and trying to leave the carriage are no good
because there's no one around and they're going really fast, so she
agrees to behave if they untie and ungag her. They have the lady
untie Heather's legs, which makes Heather realize how careful they've
been of her modesty. Weird. Anyway, they chat a little and we learn
kidnappers' plan: they'll tell anyone who is curious that they're
taking this girl back to her father because she ran away to the
immoral London. Apparently, no one would bother listening to Heather
telling them that she was being kidnapped. Oh, and her reputation
couldn't take being caught with kidnappers. Yes, because my
reputation is what I'd be worried about when I was being taken
somewhere against my will by strangers. Well, different times and
different amounts of equality for women.
Oh,
also the kidnappers have been stalking the “Cynster sisters” for
about a week looking for their chance to grab one of them.
So...Sinister Sisters? Is that a tribute band for Twisted Sister?
Before Twisted Sister had formed?! Ahem. Sorry. Romance novel with
no time travel in it. Right.
Heather
considers her options, but she wants to see why they kidnapped her
and she thinks that even if she gets away, the rest of her family
will still be threatened by these people and their mysterious
motivation. I mean, I'm connecting the dots here, but I have no idea
why that lady in a castle wants revenge on folks she hasn't met.
This is all seeming very Wuthering Heights
to me. So, the kidnapper coach stops at an inn and the main
kidnapper guy, Fletcher, asks Heather if she'll behave or if they
have to tie her up again before taking her into the inn. Okay,
really? This wouldn't bother anyone? Not a single person? Ugh.
I'm so over the 1800's. Heather agrees to cooperate. She's not
under any threat, yet, and she's going to find out what's behind this
before escaping. Somehow, I don't think she'll escape on her own.
Perhaps she needs....a hero! Or that guy, Tim. Either one.
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